Brutally Honest?

Have you heard people saying I am being brutally honest? Yes, I have and I have used that phrase myself. But I am going to take this phrase out of my vocabulary now. I do not practice this phrase but I use it to communicate the extent and intent of my honest opinion. 

I recently read one FB post (sorry forgot who posted it, hence no credit), saying exactly what I have been trying to convince some of my friends to do, instead of being “brutally” or “blatantly” honest, try to be “nicely” honest or just be honest. I believe when I say I am being brutally honest, I am telling the other person to get ready I am going to be brute, even though I don’t mean it that way. This also tells the other person that I am going to be lazy and irresponsible in selecting my words and say things that most likely will hurt their feelings. 

If I already know that it may hurt the other person, why be brutal then? 

One can be honest without being brute to another person. And it’s not as hard. Just pay attention to the words you are going to say. The words you are using in your mind are not necessarily always the words you want to use to express yourself. Instead, think of it if someone else uses the same words for you, will it hurt you? I think just saying that I am being honest is enough and if you feel that it can be hurtful, be honest but use nicer words to communicate the same honest thought. Usually, we are brutally honest to the people we are close to, then it doesn’t make sense to hurt them by being lazy in choosing our words with them.

It is not easy, but riding a bike was not easy, driving a car was not easy, but we all learned it by practicing, by falling a few times, or had a few accidents. The same applies when we are communicating honest thoughts with others. Just like having a car accident will increase your car insurance, or will not have insurance if you already had 3 or more accidents, in relationship insurance terms, that means a soured or completely broken relationship. So use brutally honest words when you don’t care about that relationship.

Avoid accidents, deliberately, with good communication practices, good driving habits, and keep your insurance premium low. Driving forward,  I am going to be Nicely Honest !!!

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